A marriage counsellor, Mrs Tolulope Ajayi, says communication problem is the leading cause of divorce in society.
Ajayi made the assertion an interview with the News Agency of Nigeria (NAN) in Lagos on Saturday.
She said that many couples lacked proper communication when it came to decision making, which often led to arguments.
“Couples have problems communicating about almost everything such as the house, money, in-laws, and others.
“Poor communication hinders the growth of marriage and can lead to physical altercations, separation and even divorce.”
According to Ajayi, communication is how couples express their feelings, ideas, and expectations, build a rapport and solve problems together.
The counsellor cited pride, selfishness, neglect, lack of intimacy, among others as the causes of ineffective communication “and if left unchecked can cause irreparable damage to the relationship.”
According to her, no marriage is perfect, communication problems are bound to happen but with an open and genuine dialogue between couples, the marriage will be sustained.
“Couples must be able to express their thoughts, feelings and emotions through their words and actions.
“Showering your spouse with compliments, make them feel loved and appreciated. Also be able to speak up about what you are not happy with, in a soft and polite manner.
“Do not take decisions alone without involving the other partner and look to each other for support.”
She said that constant criticism, inability to compromise, failing to connect, receiving less attention, unresolved arguments and others are signs that a marriage lacks communication.
“Couples must accommodate each other in many small ways like developing routines for eating, sleeping, cleaning the house, sharing the bathroom and going to places that they both enjoy.”
She advised couples to consult a professional in order to secure their marriage bond.
“Seek the help of a marriage counsellor when you find it difficult to resolve the issue or when you begin to show signs of a problem with communication,” she said.
